Bone Dry Faith

If you are anything like me, you have had times where your faith has felt dry. Times when you wished you were more passionate in your spiritual walk, times when you wished your heart broke for the things that break His heart. You see passionate people around you and you just don't feel the same way. Maybe you even sit in your room wishing you could trust God with your WHOLE heart, wishing His joy would pour out of you.You wish you could magically grow into a more passionate believer who recognizes the power of God and trusts in that. If any of those scenarios sound familiar, you are probably a lot like me. I have had many times in my faith where things have felt dry, even though I wanted to be passionately in love with Christ and joyful in every circumstance. 

One thing I absolutely love about God is that He never fails to remind us of truth and remind us of who He is through creation, people, or seemingly insignificant things around us. 

Yesterday, while I was nannying, one of the girls was showing me these things called Orbeez. They are these little bitty balls that you put in water overnight and they absorb a ton of water. She brought some downstairs that she had already made and they were pretty big, a lot bigger than I expected them to be. I began to read the directions, and here are some things it said: "Orbeez will grow to about 100-300 times their original volume. The purer the water the larger they grow." Then it goes on to say, "Try growing Orbeez in different solutions (you can try tap water with salt, filtered or distilled water, milk, soda, juice). Measure how large they grow in these liquids. Hint: The purer the solution the larger they grow."

I thought they were kind of fun and cool and we were playing with them. Then, the Lord opened my eyes to the beautiful example of a passionate faith right in front of me. Sure, it seems silly that a little polymer ball soaked in water would remind me of that, but stay with me for a minute. =)

First of all, the Orbeez balls have to soak in water overnight, which takes time. Soaking is a process, and the transformation needs that process or nothing would happen and they would still be dry and unusable. So many times I wish I could magically be a passionate Christian, but it takes time. Following Christ is more about the journey with Him. We live in a culture that wants things immediately and would rather skip right to the results and bypass the process. I think Christ is less worried about the results and more enthralled by our journey with Him. It is through the journey that we learn to love Him more and learn to dance with Him and enjoy where He takes us and not worry about where our feet are. 

We can't expect to grow if we aren't willing to absorb the water. In the Bible, the Word of God is often compared to living water. To grow in our faith, we have to go to Jesus who is the source of living water. We have to put effort into growing. We have to be willing to dig into the Word and mediate on it and simply spend time with Jesus. How is a relationship going to grow if you never put effort into it? When Orbeez are taken out of a sealed container with a little water in it, they dry out. When you take them out for a little bit, nobody would know, but it is a slow fade. Once out of the life-giving water, they slowly begin to dry out and shrink into a nasty little wrinkled piece of grossness (great mental picture, huh?). What a beautiful example of the importance of soaking up the living water every day. 

Psalm 1:1-3 

"Blessed is the one who does not walk in step with the wicked or stand in the way that sinners take or sit in the company of mockers, but whose delight is in the law of the Lord, and who meditates on his law day and night. That person is like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither- whatever they do prospers."

I loved how the instructions challenged you to put them in different liquids to experiment how much they grow. It said that the purer the solution, the more they grow. Think about that...the PURER the solution, the MORE they grow. What a cool picture of what it looks like to grow in our faith. the PURER the source, the more you will grow. The Purest source of Spiritual food is the Bible. Those are the words of God himself. Sure, we can grow through friends, church, Christian living books, community groups, podcasts, etc but unless we have the purest source of food, we will not grow nearly as much. There is a lot of great truth in books and church, but where where does that truth come from? The Bible.

John 7:37-38

"On the last and greatest day of the festival, Jesus stood and said in a loud voice, "Let anyone who is thirsty come to me and drink. Whoever believes in me, as Scripture has said, rivers of living water will flow from within them."

When I think back to the times in my life when my faith has felt more dry, I realize it was because I was not soaking up the Word. I may have read it during those times, but I was not truly soaking it up. I was not letting the truth penetrate into my life and change my heart. It became merely a habit. I have found that I grow the most when I change up my routine and study different things. Some people grow more when they keep the same routine and read through the Bible as a whole. Some grow the most when they pick a chapter and dig down deep. Some grow by studying a specific story. Some grow the most when they read a verse a day but spend time meditating on it. The Lord has created us all differently. I tend to grow the most when I take one chapter at a time and really spend time studying it and trying to live it out, one verse at a time. I also tend to grow the most when I change up my routine such as going to a coffee shop or going outside or going hiking and mediating on Scripture. Right now I am studying Psalm 119. Let me tell ya, this one is probably going to take a long time Ha! It's just a tad chunky. If there was a chapter that ate too many cookies, it would be this one. Holy cow. I am taking it one bite at a time, or should I say 2 verses at a time? For me, two verses per day has allowed me to spend more time reading and thinking about those two verses throughout the day. Like I said, we are all different and each person is going to grow in a different way. But one thing I know for sure, when I am feeling dry in my faith, I know there's something that needs to change in the way that I am reading Scripture. When I allow the truth to penetrate my life, He is always faithful to give me life through His living water. 
By the way, if you all know of any good studies on Psalm 119 I would love for you to leave a comment with a link! 

Just Imagine

Due to not having access to my computer the last few days, here are the last couple of blog posts.

Whimsical Love Day 3

There's just something about a child's imagination that captivates you. I have been blessed to nanny two sweet girls for the third summer in a row. One of my favorite things is when I come in the house of a morning and can hear imagination flowing from the other side of the house. It's impossible not to smile and love every second of it. At all times she is either playing Barbies, dolls, ponies, dress-up, or house. It always brings me back to my childhood. That was my life. But instead of ponies, I would somehow make my three older brothers sit down for a tea party. I'm still not sure how that one happened, but I do have a picture of it somewhere to prove it!

Sometimes I would even dress up my cats and bring them to the tea party (So that's why Ernest ended up becoming a 22 lb recluse........). 

Every time I played house my name would be Laura, and I would not answer when my mom called for Shae. I simply whispered in her ear that my name was not Shae, it was Laura. After awhile she would see I was playing house and would automatically call me Laura. I was a different person and in a different place when my imagination was flowing. You see, something happens when your imagination is going. You enter a place of nonstop adventures and happiness. Whether you are being chased by a dinosaur, playing the role of a mom with ten babies (holy cow), running away from the bad guys (everyone in sight) and pretending to be a spy, or whatever it is, adventure is everywhere. I'm sure I was probably one of those kids who had more fun with the boxes. After all, you could build massive castles with them!

Claire, the little girl I nanny was playing house that day and asked me to play house with her. Why not? So she gave a doll to me and she picked up a doll for herself. She continued to play and picked up a Precious Moments Bible. She took it to the other side of the room and said, "Ok, I am going to study Jesus." I couldn't stop reflecting on how beautiful that phrase was. Sometimes it's a child that can put things in a more beautiful and innocent way. Not that this is bad, but we often call it a Bible study or a group study or something but there was something about studying Jesus. Her childlike faith and innocence challenged me. How beautiful would it be if we simply studied Jesus? And not only studied Him, but obeyed Him?

As I was playing house, I began thinking, why did God create imagination? What is its purpose?

In Genesis 1, God created animals, humans, plants, the atmosphere, and more. I don't know about you but that takes A LOT of imagination. I can just imagine the Creator getting ideas for animals and having a childlike excitement as He chooses where each one will live, what they will look like, what kind of fur they will have, and what kind of body they would have. Then, I imagine Him getting excited as He gets to decide what the very first humans would look like. I imagine a glow in His eyes as He decides what kind of hair they will have, what their body shape would be, what their eye colors would be, what their skin tone would be, and what their personality would be. You know He had to have so much fun with this. After all, God is the king of imagination!!! 

We are made in God's image and imagination is without a doubt a character trait of the Creator. When you think about it, everything begins with imagination. Whether that's a game kids make up, any kind of appliance, the design of your house, and the list goes on and on. Although the Lord blessed children with an extra dose of imagination, everyone has some (some more that others!). As an artist, I can relate to this in a cool way. I love having an idea for a new project, whether that's a mosaic, painting, pottery piece, or a sculpture and getting to see that idea become a masterpiece and being able to call it good.

When imagination and excitement collide, barriers are knocked down and it is easier to pursue the Lord's plans. When I get excited about the Lord's imagination for my life and the plans He has for me, it's almost impossible to hold back from following Him 100%. After all, who has a better imagination for my life? 

Did you know imagination can even be a form of worship? If the Lord has made imagination and has even used it, why can't it be another form of worship? Someone mentioned that to me one time and I remember thinking about it. Once I thought about it, worship in church became alive. I was able to think about the lyrics in a new and beautiful way. One of my favorite songs says "I'm running to your arms, I'm running to your arms, the riches of your love will always be enough. Nothing compares to your embrace." I love this song because it enables me to use my imagination. I picture myself running to my king as fast as I can with outstretched arms, then embracing arms that are way bigger than I am. The picture He puts in my head while singing that song is one that sticks with me. When you think about it, faith requires imagination. 2 Corinthians 4: 18 says, "So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary but what is unseen is eternal." Hebrews 11 speaks of many people who showed great faith (or imagination) who followed the Lord's plans even when they could not see them. After all, Hebrews 11 starts off saying, "Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see." Oh the beautiful gift of imagination!!

Change

Satan has kept me from blogging for awhile, telling me I had to have some kind of profound and life-changing study to share in order to post something. After a few days of studying for finals and not getting a ton of sleep, I moved back home and decided to take a nap. I could not fall asleep. My mind was racing. I was thinking about how far the Lord has brought me these last two years in college, the friends I made, the adventures I went on, and the people who have changed my life. I thought about some of my friends who have decided to follow the Lord even though there would be a huge change. I thought about how the Lord has worked in my life and challenged me to embrace change. I don't know why, but my loving Father and Savior made it clear to me I was supposed to blog today.

My old high school's graduation is today and it made me think about my days in high school. I remembered learning Spanish and honestly hating it. I never wanted to learn a different language. The thought of becoming fluent in another language seemed exciting but way too daunting. It takes time. It takes a willingness to make a change. It takes a leap of faith since you never know if God may call you to another country where you never saw yourself going. The Lord shattered that pride and started to give me a strong desire to learn French, especially since Madagascar's second language is French. I have never enjoyed learning a language until now. Why? Because God changed my motives. Languages are one of the best ways to show someone from a different country you care enough about them to spend time learning how to love on them through communication. How are we going to change the World and impact people if we can't even talk to people in different countries? How will we be able to work along side other Christians when we can't speak to them? Think about how many more opportunities there are to love on people and share the gospel when you can have a conversation with them. How is change going to happen if we aren't willing to make a change ourselves?

This year the Lord blessed me with an incredible job. During the school year, I get to work in DBU's international office, where I get to tutor students who took a leap of faith and came to DBU to learn English. I got to tutor and minister to students from all over the world, including Africa, Chile, Italy, Korea, China, Brazil, and many other places. I have been so encouraged by their willingness to make a change and go where the Lord led them. They were willing to follow the Lord and travel to a strange country where they could not even have a conversation with someone for awhile. Those students have no idea what kind of impact they made on me this year. One of my favorite memories of the year is when we took a group of international students to the Canton flea market and on the way we all sang the song "If You're Happy and You Know it." Here's the cool part....we sang it in 6 different languages at once and I got to sing it in French. I have never appreciated different languages and cultures until this year. Funny thing is, I used to be a home body. Now, I desire to travel so I can see other parts of the Lord's beautiful creation and see His creativity in other cultures.

As I am sitting in my backyard, I looked over only to see a bright green lizard change from green to brown. He wasn't afraid of change or where he was going next. He simply embraced it. If lizards did not change colors, there would be a lot of fear since they would have more predators seeking them. Selah on that for a second. When we don't embrace change, we live with so much more fear... fear that cripples us. Fear of the unknown. Fear of the known. If we are unwilling to embrace change, think about how Satan has a foothold. I believe one of the greatest ways Satan holds us back from loving on people is through our fear of change. Not only does this change include embracing the nations with Him, but embracing the people around you. Don't be afraid of change. Close your eyes, grasp your Savior's sovereign and loving hands, and dance with Him as He takes you on a beautiful and life-changing adventure. I promise you won't regret a thing.

Beggars of the King

I got back from Madagascar about a month ago and throughout the two weeks we spent there, the beggars flocked to us. Many of them see a white person and immediately see them as money. They see the white men as people who have what they want and therefore see Americans as gift-givers. While it is heartbreaking to see these people in desperate need, giving them money is not always the most beneficial response. They know we have money and we know we have the money. The problem is, there are so many long-term effects at hand. As a missionary, we want to be generous and seek out the needs of the people and teach them. It creates problems when we go about it the wrong way as the people can easily see us only as gift-givers and not as a friend. For awhile I was greatly annoyed at the amount of beggars since some saw me as a gift-giver and never had a desire to get to know me and hear what I had to say. I knew that just handing money over to them may bring them short term happiness, but would create long term obstacles. I'm sure by saying no to the beggars they saw me as a greedy American who had what they needed and was unwilling to give it to them, but I knew that as someone who loved them and could see past the present need, I had to do what I knew was best for them. I love the precious people of Madagascar, so I want to serve them and teach them how to find pure Joy in the Lord as well as teach them how to better their lifestyle and live according to their means.

AND THEN IT HIT ME....like a mud hole followed by boulders on the road in the bush....I am often like a beggar to the Lord.

So many times it is easy to see the Lord as a gift-giver who has the ability to give me anything I want, like a little genie. Sure, He has the ability to give me anything, but out of love, He limits Himself. Think about how many times your prayers consist of asking the Lord for things, and how many times your prayers consist of sitting at His feet and praising Him and wanting to learn from the King of Kings. I can't even begin to count how many times I or someone else has said something along the lines of God is not answering my prayers because he said no. Even a no is an answer to prayer. Sure, God could say yes to everything we ask for, and we may be happy, but our heart will not be after His. The Lord is not after us being happy, but transforming a heart into one of pure joy who is after the Lord's great heart. There are times when the Lord gives us what we want, but many times He shows His love through wanting to teach us and transform our heart.

 ⁸ “For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
neither are your ways my ways,”
declares the Lord.
⁹ As the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts." Isaiah 55:8-9

Do you find your identity in the yeses you get from the Lord, or from the heart transformation He offers? As the daughters' hearts transform to the King's, we find ourselves looking to God as a gift-giver less, and sitting at His feet more, learning about His heart as we desire Him rather than His gifts. Think about friendships where you sought them only because of what they could give you and do for you and then think about the friendships where you wanted to get to know the person and serve them. Think about the difference in those relationships. The first may seem gratifying for a short amount of time, but the second one brings a much deeper and stronger relationship since your motives are not selfish, but those of humility and service. Think about the difference in our relationship with God when we seek after the gifts less, and His beautiful glory and presence in our life more.

Oh the beauty of sitting at the beloved King's feet as His precious and chosen daughters, seeking His heart and His desires.