Grace is Where My Song Begins

                                                                       

Sometimes, Switchfoot says it best. 

"Economy of Mercy"

Sometimes, I like to think I have it all together. Sometimes I like to think that I can become a stronger Christian by pulling myself up by my boot straps and growing through sheer discipline. Sometimes, I like to think that I am where I am in my faith because of me. Sometimes, I like to think just maybe I can do it. Just maybe I can be strong enough. Just maybe I can deal with my own sin. Just maybe I can be independent. Just maybe I can be adequate enough for the next task ahead. 

Then, my sweet Jesus bends down and reminds me in my pride that it is through GRACE that I am saved. It is His GRACE that rescues me. It is only by His sweet GRACE that my life can be renovated and sweetly and radically transformed. 

I grew up often thinking I was pretty good, knowing I needed Jesus, but not living like it. 

If you are anything like me, you grew up in churches that taught we were commanded to share the gospel. If we didn't obey, then we were sinning. There is some truth to this. We are commanded to share the gospel, but the way it is taught in most churches is something to be done out of duty. One of the most life-changing things I have ever heard is something that my pastor, Rodney, shares with us almost every Sunday. He shares the grace of God with us. He often says,  "When grace becomes capital letters in our life, missional living becomes natural." Wait a second, you mean sharing the gospel can be NATURAL? It had always been a little scary....until now. When we realize God's great grace on our lives, it produces a great desire to tell your friends. When grace brings us to our knees and shows us just how much Jesus has done for us, how can we possibly not tell people out of our joy and thankfulness. 

If grace was currency, I would be the first one to use it. 

Why do we make Christianity into some kind of 10 step process to becoming a better Christian? We see blogs flooding facebook with titles with some number of things you need to do in your faith. A number of ways to become a stronger Christian. A number of ways to get a better prayer life or something like that. I think we do this, because it makes it easier. It's easier to write down a few steps and cross them off. It makes it easier to have a list of things we can do. It makes it easier to feel good about ourselves. Why is it so hard to just see His perfect grace and just love Jesus? I think it's because it's harder to just give up trying to DO things. It's harder to live by the Spirit because then, we can't be in control. But, when we became a Christian, we gave up every right to try to be in control. We gave up our life. We gave up trying to earn God's approval. But, we gained an abundant life. My mentor just posted a wonderful blog about our self-reliance in our Christian walk. If you are feeling challenged, read it here.

You see, after we give up our pride in trying to do things ourselves, things become so much simpler, as His yoke is light.  "Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light." Matthew 11: 28-30 His yoke is easy because Christianity isn't a list of things you have to do, you simply get to love Jesus deeply. 

Growing in our faith no longer becomes this list of 25 things to do, but crying out to God to show us His grace and to help us to love Him more deeply. 

My two favorite words in the Bible are "But God."

"But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which He loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ-by GRACE you have been saved and raised us up with Him and seated us with Him in the heavenly placed in Christ Jesus, so that in the coming ages He might show the immeasurable riches of His GRACE in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus." Ephesians 2:4-7

Out of everyone I know, I am the most unsavable. If there's one thing I have learned this year about my sweet Jesus, is that He loves to save the most unsavable and redeem the most broken. I get to be a broken mess, saved by a perfect and redemptive God. I am the most undeserving of the gospel out of all the people I know. I am the most inadequate...But I serve a God who isn't.

Why my New Year's resolution is different this year

As I was thinking about what I wanted to have as my resolution this year, things like eating better, getting back into the habit of running, being more intentional with friends, and several other things popped up in my head. I'm definitely a visionary but I like to set goals that I know I can accomplish  but that are also challenging.

I sat there thinking, what will make this year different? If you are anything like me, you set these great goals but don't end up staying with it the whole year. Then, you screw up one time and get down on yourself. The Lord graciously challenged me not to make these surface level things my resolutions but to look at the core of the motives behind the them.

Then it hit me, the core is to know Jesus better.

"For His sake I have suffered the loss of all things and count them as rubbish, in order that I may gain Christ and be found in Him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which comes through faith in Christ, the righteousness from God that depends on faith-that I may know Him and the power of His resurrection, and may share His sufferings..." -Philippians 3:8-10

The more I know Jesus, the more I will love Him.

The more I learn about His character, the more I am in absolute awe of the God we serve. I couldn't think of
anything else worth giving my life to. I want to learn more and more about His character this year. I want to dive into the Bible and not only read about Him, but study some of His character traits. We often throw around these traits like sovereign, omniscient, pure, holy, and others but do we truly know the depths of these meanings and not just a surface definition? The more I have learned about Him the more I have loved Him throughout my life.

"And He said to him, 'You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.'"

                     Matthew 22:37

This verse gets quoted a lot but this year I want to study it and really understand the depths of this kind of love in this verse.

The more I love Him, the more I will want to take care of my body and treasure the people I am around.

For me personally, the more I love Him the more I will appreciate the body He has given me and will treat it like a temple. Instead of dreading going for a run, it will be a way I can show appreciation for what the Lord has given me and show appreciation for the fact that I have the ability to get up and go run. The more I love Him, the more I will want to eat the foods He created for us to eat. Eating very healthy will become more of a joy because it will be a way for me to show appreciation for what He has given us to eat. How often are we truly thankful for the beautiful natural foods He has prepared for us? I don't know about you, but I'm not nearly as thankful and appreciative as I should be. Don't get me wrong, I don't think it's bad to eat a good chunk of brownie (If this was true then I would have been struck by lighting way too many times.....). God created sugar and wants us to enjoy it, but I believe it is to be enjoyed in moderation.

The more I love God, the more I want to treasure the wonderful friends He has placed in my life. The more I treasure them, the more gospel-based our friendships are and the deeper the conversations. I would love to be better about writing letters to friends this year so that it shows I treasure them enough to go out of my way to write something and send it through the mail to them. That's one thing I would love to bring back from childhood. Also, the more I love God the more I want to serve my roommates and friends and serve them without expecting anything in return. I want to serve them as a picture of how Christ serves us. We worship a God who was worthy of praise but came to earth not to be served, but to serve (Matt 20:28).

Please don't get me wrong, I am not saying it's wrong to have great resolutions like losing weight, eating better, and working out. This is just something the Lord was challenging me with and I wanted to use it to encourage you all and also to have accountability on my part. I would love for you to ask throughout the year what I have learned about God and how I know him more. Even if you aren't close friends with me it would mean the world to have people around asking me that question. Not only would I love the accountability, but I would love to share what I'm learning about Him.

Here's the funny thing...I am so incredibly broken and sinful that I can't even know and love Him on my own. I have to humbly ask for the desire to truly know Him. I have to ask for the diligence to not only be in the word, but to study it. I have to ask the Lord to graciously open my eyes and remove my self-love. This righteousness does not come from myself or my resolutions, it comes from faith in Jesus and His power.

After all of this had been going through my head, I went to church this morning to hear a phenomenal sermon about numbering our days. My pastor, Rodney, mentioned that according to Psalm 90 we will not be able to number our days until we truly understand the nature of God, the nature of man, and the problem of sin. I want to remember how fleeting my life is and realize I am but a vapor. Why? Because at the end of my life I don't want to look back at all the things I accomplished for nothing. I want to deeply know Jesus. I want to deeply know Jesus so I can passionately love Him and love others.

"Your sweep them away as with a flood; they are like a dream, like grass that is renewed in the morning: in the morning it flourishes and is renewed; in the evening it fades and withers."   

Psalm 90:5-6

"The grass withers, the flower fades, but the word of our God will stand forever."

                                                                        Isaiah 40:8

SURPRISE!!!!

I used to try to control things, now I let Jesus delight in loving me.

"For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother's womb...My frame was not hidden from you, when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth." Psalm 139: 13, 15

If you are a Christian you have probably heard this verse a ton of times, but I encourage you not to become calloused to how amazing this is. Think about it... He knit you together and intricately wove you. Think about this in an even more detailed way. I imagine God as being a joyful creator that takes great delight in what He creates. I imagine Him creating someone and getting giddy with excitement as He picks the eye color, or multiple colors, skin pigment, body shape, hair color and style, personality, and so much more. I imagine Him in an art room creating a masterpiece that He is so excited about making and then proudly shows his masterpiece off to everyone around. He then treasures that artwork and takes great delight in it even after He has completed it. Think about how excited He was to mold you and create you into the person you are. Not only did He delight in you when He made you , but He still delights in you to this day!

Now, think about this. He knows His masterpiece better than it knows itself. He knows us and loves us more than we can love ourselves. Now, look at it from a little different perspective. We are all soooo incredibly different and we feel loved in different ways. Not only does this show how creative God is, but it shows us how much He knows us. There are five basic love languages: words of affirmation, quality time, physical touch, gifts, and acts of service. Obviously these are not all inclusive, so I'm going to add surprises as the 6th love language. 

I used to try to worry about my future and want to have everything planned, then the Lord showed me how He wanted to love on me: by surprises. Like I said, He made us so He knows us better than we know ourselves. At the time that did not sound fun but after teaching me to trust Him He started to work everything out with little surprises along the way. I grew to love life's surprises no matter what it was. Once I allowed God to love on me the way He wanted to, my relationship with Him grew immensely and He gave me the grace to delight in Him much more. 

Things I used to think were coincidences or mundane things became surprises the Lord used to love on me. It's amazing how whimsical His love becomes when He opens your eyes to it. Things

like flowers off by themselves, a bird hiding in a beautiful bush, my cat randomly walking in to love on me, a letter from a friend, a surprise gift, and many others became ways the Lord delighted in loving me. It's Christmas day which is making me think back to Christmases throughout my life. Even when I was little, I was never the one to try to find my presents or figure out what everything was. I delighted in the surprise element. Why? Because that's how God created me to see His love. The best is when its a surprise inception ha! One of my favorite surprise inceptions was when God placed a trip to Madagascar in my hands, provided everything I needed, provided awesome connections in ways I would never have thought, and so much more. One of my favorite surprise moments was when I got to hold a lemur in my lap (There weren't even supposed to be lemurs around) and it even fell asleep. To me, lemurs represent His faithfulness and His love. 

I've never been much of a fan of those predictable movies. I'm a lover of surprise endings. One of my favorite surprise endings is how Jesus came into the world. A predictable story would have gone like this: Jesus comes as a jacked 25 year old on a giant horse with flames coming from all sides with a chariot. He kills every human that has wronged Him (everyone) and takes over the world as it should be. But, we serve a humble God who surprised everyone. The creator of the universe came to earth as a helpless baby that couldn't do anything and needed his diapers changed. Then, He didn't even come as some warrior to take over the world. He grew up only to die a terrible and degrading death so that every person that has wronged Him could have the opportunity to believe in Him, give Him their lives, and live in Heaven forever. If that's not a surprise ending that shows love, I don't know what is.

So what's the point to this seemingly cheesy mess?

The God that hand-crafted you loves you more than you can imagine and knows exactly what makes you feel loved. For some of you that will be through words of affirmation. Open your eyes to the way people affirm you this week but most importantly pay attention to how the Lord affirms you throughout the Bible. Maybe keep a journal of what He says about you. For some it is service. Open your eyes to the whimsical ways the Lord serves you this week. If it's physical touch, pay attention to the ways people love on you and instead of automatically thinking it was that person, think about how the Lord is using them to love you. For others it's quality time. Allow your Creator to spend time with you this week! Don't rush through your quiet times. Allow Him to love you!! If it's gifts, open your eyes to the gifts He places all around you, such as a flower  that you see or something someone gives you or something that seems out of the ordinary. But remember, God often works in what seems like the ordinary, just waiting for us to open our eyes to His creative and whimsical love. Struggle seeing His whimsy? I challenge you to 10 days of whimsical love.

Some may call it cheesy, but I call it delighting in loving.

Community and Confession

Take a second to think back on when you were little and your mom told you to clean your room. You go into your room, disgusted by what is in there. You've got clothes covering every inch of your floor, moldy grapes you forgot to take out of your lunch box (guilty), unknown scents coming from every direction, shoes that have been worn too many times, socks you forgot to wash from last month's football game, Christmas candy you got 3 years ago that you forgot to eat, and a ball for every sport covering the floor. Naturally, you decide the best way to clean is to stuff everything into your over packed closet. You sit there, praying your mom doesn't come in and experience a Zoboomafoo episode where the closet creates an avalanche. Some of you are thinking "when I was little?....that happened the other day...." 

Out of sight, out of mind right? Here's the problem...it's still there. 

The purpose of this blog is to help you recognize your sin and realize the gift of community the Lord gives us so that we can experience the beautiful healing from our sin. 

The purest form of community comes from Jesus Himself. 

God the Son, God the Father, and the Holy Spirit are three in one. They have different roles, but they work together as one. We are created in His image as Genesis 1:26 says, "Let us make man in our image, after our likeness." We are created not only to live in community, but to be dependent on our community with the Lord; therefore, to reject light and community is to reject God.

We live in a culture that is extremely individualized. We are taught to follow our own dreams and do whatever we can to make ourselves successful. The more independent you are, the more success you will have and the stronger you will be. You don't need anyone. Dependence=weakness. But, here's the thing...that is what culture tells us but God tells us differently. Unfortunately pride destroys community. When God created Adam and Eve, not only did they have perfect community with each other but with God. Because Adam and Eve desired to be as wise as God, their community became distorted. So, pride is now the #1 thing that gets in the way of healing from sin, as well as deep community. 

Walk in the radiant, life-giving light rather than the destructive darkness.

Sorry ahead of time for any nightmares....

When I was in Madagascar last Christmas break, the other girl on the trip and I were in a hotel room in the bush. The whole trip, I was praying I would not encounter a Madagascar hissing cockroach. Let's just be honest...those things are TERRIFYING. Not only are they the size of a lumber jack's beard, but they hiss at you....they HISS!! Maybe I'm just a wimp, but that sounds terrifying. We were sitting in our room when my roommate during the trip went into the bathroom and turned on the light. As soon as she did this, I heard a shriek. As my eyes popped open, I asked what happened. There was a Madagascar hissing cockroach in the bathroom and as soon as she turned on the light, it scurried under some pipes behind the wall. Well, that's comforting. Then, it was my turn to take a shower. There I was, praying the electricity didn't go off, leaving me and a blood-thirsty, man-eating cockroach. (ok, so maybe I'm being a little dramatic....but still) Then, guess what happened. Yup, the lights went out. You can only imagine where my thoughts went. I was glad it was in the wall somewhere so it could be out of sight, out of mind but deep down I wished it was in the middle of the floor where I could see it so I could kill it right there. 

We often think that if our sin is out of sight, it is out of mind, but how much more life-giving would it be if we brought it into the light? 

I believe our failure to confess keeps us from experiencing some of God's greatest blessings of mercy and grace. "Take no part in the unfruitful works of darkness, but instead expose them" (Ephesians 5:11). Sin requires the absence of light to survive. For most of my life I thought I could process all my sin on my own, but now I know the freedom and healing that comes through community. As long as God knows, nobody else needs to know, right? Wrong. That was my pride that held me back from the healing that comes from confession in community. I thought I could be independent and be just as close to God, but God created us to be dependent, not only on Him, but on the community He gives us. After all, what better way to make Christ strong than boasting in our weaknesses?

Not only does confession produce unwavering forgiveness, but freedom through healing.

"God is light, and in him is no darkness at all. If we say we have fellowship with him while we walk in darkness, we lie and do not practice truth. But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus his Son cleanses us from all sin... If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness" (1 John 1:5-9). Isn't it good to know we don't serve a God that just sometimes forgives us? We serve a God that is FAITHFUL to forgive when we ask. Although He is faithful to forgive us, we are likely to continue the vicious cycle if we do not confess to one another and repent. He then gives us the Word to guide us through repentance and life change. We are dependent on His forgiveness. 

After we ask for forgiveness and repentance, healing occurs when we bring our sin into the light. James 5:16 says, "Confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man has great power as it is working" (James 5:16). Healing from sin comes from bringing your sin into light among fellow believers. There is great freedom in great community. 

What in your life needs to be brought into the light so that you can be healed and thus walk in the freedom you have because of Jesus? Maybe it's some kind of addiction, lust, anger, bitterness, jealousy, self-righteousness, some kind of sexual sin, unforgiveness, pride, insecurities, idolatry, or anything else. May we be not only hearers of the Word, but doers (James 1:22-25). Let me encourage you this week to bring your sin into the light among believers that will hold you accountable and remind you of the grace our God give us. May you no longer walk in the destructive darkness, but the radiant, life-giving light. 

The Pursuit

There she was. 
He saw her.

He loved her before she ever knew who he was. How did she not know? He knew she would be his one day and that she would be his forever. 

The beautiful pursuit took him six years, but the even more beautiful part of his pursuit was that it continued even after she was his forever. 

The day he won her over was one of the greatest days of his life. He couldn't help but smile and hold her tightly. The embrace was beautiful. They were both so excited for the days and years to come as they would take this journey together. He had sacrificed so much just to be able to love her and pursue her in the most beautiful way. Why? Because his love was unlike any other.

He knew her better than anyone else. He knew her heart. He knew what she loved the most and what she desired the most. He loved her in the most whimsical ways through daily gifts and through his love and truth. He told her daily she was beautiful and treasured, but she felt inadequate. He told her again, "You are beautiful and treasured and you are mine." Every day he pursued her through daily surprises in the most beautiful and unique ways. He was there whenever she needed him, and even when she didn't think she needed him. He was there for her. At times she was unfaithful to him but he had made her a promise to love her unconditionally, so he pursued her. She tried to pursue others while being pursued by the one that truly loved her. She knew she was loved, yet she didn't know the depth of his love. 

There she was.

Broken.

Discontent.

Crying her eyes out on a pile of broken glass.

He walked up to her and gently wrapped his arms around her and said, "I love you. I really love you. Open your eyes to the one who is pursuing you. I have been here the whole time yet you did not see me. Take my hand, let's go home. Let's continue this journey together." He proved over and over again that he was faithful to her, even in her unfaithfulness. He was whole, even though she was broken. He had forgiven her and brought her back, ready to love her just as much as before. Every morning he would look at her and smile as he delighted in her. There was no way he was going to let anyone take her away after that six year pursuit. He planned to pursue her the rest of her life even though she was already his. Not only did he love her with a passionate love, but he was jealous for her. Knowing other things would try to pull her away and take her eyes off of her true love, he watched over her and fought anything and everyone that tried to take her away. He wanted her and loved her. 

One day her eyes were open to the truth he had told her since he began pursuing her. She began to think about all the journeys they had been on and how beautiful life was when she was with him. She began to treasure him and take great delight in who he was. Her eyes were finally opened. She began to pursue him in a beautiful way. She learned how to pursue from his unwavering pursuit of her. She learned to love because she knew his love. She learned to speak beautiful truth to others because he had spoken beautiful truth to her. She learned to love the broken because he loved her brokenness. She learned to pursue the faithless because she had been pursued in her faithlessness. She wanted to change the world, because her world had been changed. 

He walked up to her and said, "My precious daughter, Shae, I love you and you are mine. Take hold of my hand, trust me, and be ready for the beautiful journey called Life that I have for you. I am faithful so remember my promises to you. I will never leave you or forsake you. Treat others just as I have treated you and be ready to change the world. Make disciples and teach them what I have taught you. Pursue others with the love I have pursued you with. Stop trying to look forward to destination points and enjoy the journey."

But God

I am inadequate, BUT GOD.....

For the first time in my life I have been homesick. These last few weeks my heart has ached to be back home in Madagascar. Recently I have been reading a new book on Madagascar I got for my birthday. It has literally brought me so much joy to read about the different reserves there and about their culture. Also, I have been reading over my journal I kept while I was there on a two week mission trip during this last Christmas break. 

Reading these journal entries bring me Joy when I read about the times when I got to hold lemurs and even have one fall asleep on my lap. This sounds crazy that something like that would bring me so much joy, but you have to understand the story behind all of this. Here's a blog post that explains a little more about my journey.There was also a journal entry when I mentioned some people coming to Christ and said, "The Lord has without a doubt gone before us and prepared the precious hearts of the people here...Can't wait to sit at the King's feet in praise with my Malagasy brothers and sisters." 

 My heart aches when I read "It is so sad to walk down the neighborhood slums while stepping all over trash. There are bush houses everywhere and people sleeping outside where flies cover them. Kids run around naked, sometimes chewing on random things they find around. The poverty is astonishing, but I feel like home." While it is sad to see some of these people in such destitution, I envy their simplicity. Christians there are less distracted and chase after the Lord with ALL of their heart. Their simplistic lives allow them to focus more on others than themselves. 

Then, I start laughing when I read "Can't wait to step off that plane and feel the reality of the Lord's perfect faithfulness. That is, if this tiny plane doesn't break haha...every sound makes us wonder" and things like "Imagine waking up to a loud cow bell at 5 in the morning, angry cats and dogs, roosters...and the guys talking." You have to love "That moment when the Madagascar hissing cockroach disappears..."


Here's a journal entry that I wrote the other day.

"Lately I have felt so homesick, Homesick for the land I love, homesick for the people that stole my heart before I even met them. I long desperately for the moment when I get to hand a new Bible to a new believer. I long for the absolute joy they will express when they have your precious word in their hands. I long to see the smiles on the faces-the smiles that can not be contained-smiles that are bigger than ever. I long to see them so moved by you that they can't help but cry tears of absolute joy, joy that they are found, joy that they are loved, joy that there is hope beyond their destitution, hope beyond their pain, hope beyond their desperate pleas through animism. I long to see their heavy chains that have held them in bondage for so many years shatter and fall to the ground in uncountable pieces. I long for the day when I get to see one of the hardest of hearts melted by your embrace. I long for the day when one of the women I will get to disciple will take others under her wing and love on them. I long for the day when revivals in Southern Mada bring thousands to their knees...Sometimes I feel so inadequate, but then I can't help but feel more powerful and equipped as ever because I know who goes before me. I know how faithful you are and how strong you are. Give me the courage to follow you step by step in this journey. I hope I get to write a book someday about how faithful you were in this process...I long for the day when people read that book and long for you more."

Recently the Lord has been calling me to write a book someday about my journey to encourage people by writing about the Lord's incredible faithfulness throughout all these years, beginning when He called me to be a missionary when I was just a child... and the journey has just begun! 

Philippians 1:6

"And I am sure of this, that He who began a good work in you is faithful to bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ." 

I am inadequate....BUT GOD

During that trip, it was so easy to compare myself to all those seminary Bible experts that seemed to have awesome answers and that knew their stuff. I remember feeling so inadequate and wondering if God could really use me there like He had promised. I don't know all the answers. I am not perfect. I struggle with a lot of things and have a butt load of weaknesses.  I felt like I had a long way to go before I could effectively witness. The funny thing is, I am inadequate. There is nothing in me that can change lives. I am not bold. I am not a Bible genius. I am not worthy of the calling, BUT GOD goes before me. The God that made me, the God that intricately made the universe, the God that crafted each cell in the world, the God that melted the hardest of hearts (Saul/Paul) and made him into one of the greatest evangelists Christianity has ever seen, and the God that is over angel armies goes before me and prepares the way. So yes, without God I am completely inadequate, BUT God, who is adequate goes before me to prepare the path and promises to never leave me. BE COURAGEOUS. Whatever you are going through right now, trust Him. He is adequate and is able to prepare us and prepare the way. He will never leave or forsake you. Hold His hand in absolute surrender, close your eyes, and enjoy the journey He is taking you on. 

Deuteronomy 31:8

"It is the Lord who goes before you. He will be with you; he will not leave you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed."

Jealous For Me Part 2

Now that we know what righteous jealousy is, let's look at a story in the Bible where the Lord gave a beautiful example of His jealousy for His people. 

Has there ever been a time in your life where there seemed to be things you were missing out on by following Christ? Maybe you looked at friends who were not Christians and it seemed like maybe they were having more fun because they got to party and live without regrets? This is very similar to what the Israelites felt like after the Lord had rescued them from their oppression under the Egyptians. While it's easy to look back on the story in the Bible and stand amazed that they would turn from God after all He had just done for them, we do the same thing at times, don't we?

Even though they began to turn away from their Jealous God, He still lovingly pursued them by providing in miraculous ways such as the parting of the Red Sea, the cloud by day, the fire by night, the manna, the water that came from the rock, and a victory against the Egyptians. Even then, they rebelled against their leaders and began to sacrifice to other gods.

Deuteronomy 32:16-18

"They made Him jealous with their foreign gods and angered Him with their detestable idols. They sacrificed to false gods, which are not God-gods they had not known, gods that recently appeared, gods your ancestors did not fear. You deserted the Rock, who fathered you; you forgot the God who gave you birth."   

God became jealous that they were turning to other gods. The Israelites were His. He created them, He loved them more than anyone else ever could, He provided for them, and He had brought them out of slavery. He was rightfully jealous. Remember, His jealousy is righteous because they were already His, and it is out of love for them. Little did they know, the Lord was not going to let them turn away without a fight. Over and over again Moses pleaded to God on their behalf to forgive them. He did, but there were still consequences so that they would learn to follow their Maker. After pursuing them over and over again, He did what was ultimately best for them and did not allow them to enter the promise land. He would have loved to see them enter the promise land but because He was jealous for them He allowed affliction so they would learn to follow Him. While they were in the wilderness wandering around for 40 years, God continued to pursue them and provide for them in incredible ways. Even in their affliction the Lord loved on them and wanted their hearts. 

Even though the Israelites lost many battles and were often in distress, The Lord continued to show His jealousy. You see, God was too jealous for His people not to discipline them. Even in discipline He loved on His precious children, like a father sitting in time-out with his screaming child

. He showed them grace when 2 men, Joshua and Caleb, decided to trust God, while many people continued to turn away from their God. Funny how our culture tends to think God is against us when "bad things happen to good people," but He loves us too much not to allow trials to enter our lives to grow us and turn our eyes to Him.

Let me encourage you to open your eyes to the ways He is jealous for you. Sometimes He shows His jealousy through the sweet moments in life such as sweet friends, beautiful sunsets, and the creation all around you and sometimes He shows His jealousy by turning our faces to His radiant glory during trials. He loves you too much to let you live your life without hard moments which allow us to see His peace and goodness despite our sin and life-shattering trials. Even in those trials He is pursuing you in beautiful ways, such as the people around you, His Word, and ways He provides.